Celebrating Father’s Day With Our Favorite Dad Jokes

While fathers have plenty to teach us, sometimes they spin this wisdom into a “dad joke”–a true gem that makes us laugh with (and sometimes at) them. In honor of both intended and unintended advice, we’re celebrating this Father’s Day with our favorite “dad jokes” shared with us by Taskers and TaskRabbit employees.

A Man Walks Into a Bar

People don’t like having to bend over to get their drinks. We really need to raise the bar. –Curtis J., New York City

A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt. He sits down and places it next to him at the bar. The bartender asks, “What can I get for you?” The man replies, “One for me, one for the road.” –Sara B., TaskRabbit Employee

Dinner Table Discourse

Dad: I’ll have the bacon and eggs. Waitress: How do you like them? Dad: I don’t know, I haven’t gotten them yet! –Jacob C., Boston

Jokes about German Sausage are the wurst. –Austin H., Indianapolis

Did you hear they put a restaurant on the moon? The food is okay but there’s no atmosphere. –Adam P., Chicago

Scene: Dad buying milk at the grocery store. Cashier: Do you want your milk in a bag? Dad: No the carton will do just fine. –Mark H., TaskRabbit Employee

Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

Why was the surfer dude yawning at the beach? Because he was board. –Johnathan H., Norfolk, VA

Do you know why there are fences in cemeteries? Because everyone is dying to get in! –Gonzalo A., New York City

Everyday Puns

I’m sorry I can’t take you to get a new bed at IKEA today, son. You should ask your Malm. –Anonymous

I have a fear of speed bumps. I’m slowly getting over it. –Jetmir D., Vancouver Tasker

Thanks for the laughs, Dads! Jokes aside, we also want to share the best advice our community has received from their dads. Maybe you’ll pass this advice along to your own brood today or some day!

Best Advice from Dads

  • Always keep your head up no matter the situation you are in. –Johnathan H., Norfolk, VA
  • You can’t change people, but you can change their environment. –Keldin S., Boston
  • Everything in moderation: Take risks, but know when to be measured. Work hard, but enjoy your life. –Anonymous
  • Always be grateful and humble. Someone always has it worse than you so always keep that in your mind. –Cailyn J., Phoenix
  • Failure is a learning opportunity. It’s ok to fail. Measure yourself by how you respond to failure. –Jourdan W., TaskRabbit Employee

Thank you to all Taskers who contributed to this post! Are you a Tasker dad, by blood or by mentorship? If so, what is your favorite advice to give–dad joke or other?

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